A Little Comedy with a Little Crime

Matt Eastland-Jones - 0:01 Hello and welcome to Awaiting Prompt, the AI podcast hosted by me, Matt Eastland-Jones… Nick Short - 0:07 And me, Nick Short. Matt Eastland-Jones - 0:09 Each week we give an AI a series of story prompts. These could be genres, characters, plot points, and see what kind of story it comes up with. Nick Short - 0:18 We're not writers and we're certainly not authors. Matt Eastland-Jones - 0:21 We may need to give the AI a bit of direction along the way, but every single word is going to be entirely generated by an AI. Nick Short - 0:27 We’re just really interested in the technology, seeing what it can do and having a laugh at the stuff that it can't. Matt Eastland-Jones - 0:32 So if that sounds good then tune in every Friday to Awaiting prompt. Nick Short - 0:38 This week on Awaiting Prompt Matt and I are exploring some marvelous murder mysteries featuring Mels, Mildreds and Mills and Matt, you're up first. Matt Eastland-Jones - 0:52 Fade in. Exterior, Maybury Park. Night. The small town of Maybury Park is bustling with people enjoying their evening walks. A lonely figure walks around with her hands deeper in her pockets. Nick Short - 1:08 Up to the wrist. Matt Eastland-Jones - 1:10 No it’s like she’s got her entire forearms in her pockets. Cut to Exterior, Mel's house. Day. The camera pans through the small house of Mel. Nick Short - 1:20 Ah, the house of Mel. Matt Eastland-Jones - 1:24 A struggling comedian. Mel is in the kitchen trying to concoct a tasty dinner with the little she has left. Suddenly, a loud knock can be heard. Mel, startled and confused. Who could that be? Cut to exterior Mel's front door, Day. Mel opens the door and finds an old woman on the doorstep. old woman confident yet old raspy voice Hi my name is Mildred. Mel… Nick Short - 2:01 Mel and Mildred? Matt Eastland-Jones - 2:06 Mel uncertain, Hi, Mildred. Can I help you? God this bit cracks me up old woman. Ultimately doesn't doesn't acknowledge that her name is Mildred. Old woman, Yes I need your help to figure out who murdered my husband Mel taken the back blinking. Old woman, Yes, someone murdered my husband Greg and I need you to help me find out who did it I heard you were a comedian and thought you could use this opportunity as a chance to flex your detective muscles Mel, looking at the old woman with a blank expression, "Okay then?" Nick Short - 2:47 She is not prepared for this in any way. Matt Eastland-Jones - 2:49 No. Although, old woman smiling, "I'll give you a thousand dollars if you can find out who did it in time." In time for what? In time for her dinner being ready, I don't know. Mel perks up and nods happily, "You've got yourself a deal." So there we go. inciting incident has happened and now it is cut to exterior old mill, night. Nick Short - 3:25 Old Mel’s mill? Matt Eastland-Jones - 3:17 The old windmill in the middle of the woods is surrounded by a cloud of mist. Mel and Mildred approach the entrance of the windmill. Nick Short - 3:25 Mel and Mil at the mill. Matt Eastland-Jones - 3:28 Cut to interior old mill, night. Mildred and Mel creep into the beyond. Nick Short - 3:36 Old Mel and Mildred. Matt Eastland-Jones - 3:38 Mildred and Mel creep into the old mill, trying not to make a sound. Suddenly from the shadows emerges a tall figure. Mysterious figure, Ah, you two must be snooping around to find the murderer. Nick Short - 3:51 It's Greg. Matt Eastland-Jones - 3:52 Mel eyeing the figure suspiciously. Yes, that's exactly what we're doing. Mysterious figure. "Well then, I guess I wouldn't mind helping you out." Mildred and Mel exchanged confused looks. Mildred confused, yet determined. "And who must you be?" Mysterious figure, "Why, I'm the one who killed Greg, of course." Mel and Mildred both gasped in surprise, Mildred angrily pointing at the figure. "And what gave you the right to kill Greg?" Mysterious figure. Well, he was getting a bit too close to exposing my secret, which if revealed could land me in a lot of trouble. So I had to do what I had to do. Mildred, angrily. “And what secret was that?”. Mysterious figure, “I'm the mayor of this town!” But this is what gets me. Mel nodding, “Ah, that all makes sense now”. Nick Short - 4:56 Does it? Matt Eastland-Jones - 4:57 So what do we do now? Mildred We turn him into the police, of course Cut to... Exterior police station day The mayor is being taken away to the station With Mildred and Mel watching from the side Mel smiling triumphantly Well I guess that's that Mildred Yes Thanks to you, justice has been served I can't thank you enough Mel, “Don't worry It was my pleasure”. Nick Short - 5:23 She didn't do anything! Matt Eastland-Jones - 5:24 Fade out The end. Nick Short - 5:29 I was the mayor all along. It doesn't. And then he just goes to the police station. Matt Eastland-Jones - 5:33 Is the secret that he was the mayor or just the mayor had a secret? Nick Short - 5:38 Well, his name was Will and he hid the secret in the mill. And then when Mel was in the mill and she saw Will in the mill. Matt Eastland-Jones - 5:46 So, yeah, that's a bit of a ridiculous story. Nick Short - 5:49 Oh my God. Matt Eastland-Jones - 5:51 But I got it to write Mel's next case. So fade in, exterior Mel's house, day. Nick Short - 5:59 Another mysterious old woman appears at the door. Matt Eastland-Jones - 6:02 The camera pans through the small house of Mel. (both laughing) You see what I mean? It's the same thing. Nick Short - 6:09 Oh my God. Matt Eastland-Jones - 6:11 A struggling comedian. Mel is in the kitchen trying to figure out the next case she needs to solve. Suddenly, there's a loud knock at the door. Mel startled and confused. Who could that be? Cut to exterior. Mel's front door day. Mel opens the door to find a young man with a concerned expression on his face. Young man nervously, "Hi, my name's James and I need your help." Mel uncertain. Nick Short - 6:37 Why are all these people just turning up at our door? Matt Eastland-Jones - 6:39 I don't know. Mel uncertain, "Um, hi James, what can I do for you?" James, my brother. Oh sorry, James. Nick Short - 6:53 James, my brother. Matt Eastland-Jones - 6:55 James. My brother Michael is missing. I think he might have been kidnapped. I heard you were a comedian, but also a great detective. I thought maybe you could help me find my brother. Mel looking at the young man with a blank expression. Okay then. Nick Short - 7:11 She just stood there, no reaction. She's like, I guess? Matt Eastland-Jones - 7:15 All of her dialogue is exactly the same. Nick Short - 7:19 Also, I just realised, why was the mayor at the mill? Matt Eastland-Jones - 7:23 I don't know. Also, why did they have that bit at the start where there's someone walking through a park with their hands deep in their pockets? Nick Short - 7:31 Oh yeah! Matt Eastland-Jones - 7:33 I'm guessing that was the mayor. Nick Short - 7:34 You've got to keep your elbows warm. Matt Eastland-Jones - 7:37 Okay, James, please, I need your help. I'll pay you whatever you need. Mel, brightening up, “You've got yourself a deal”. Cut to exterior abandoned warehouse day. The abandoned warehouse isn't too far away from Mel's house. Mel and James approach the entrance of the warehouse. Cut to interior abandoned warehouse day. Mel and James creep inside the warehouse and suddenly from the shadows emerges two figures. Mysterious figure, “Ah, so you two must be snooping around for this missing person”. Nick Short - 8:12 What?! Matt Eastland-Jones - 8:12 Mel eyes the figures suspiciously. Yes, that's exactly what we're doing Mysterious figure Well then, I guess you wouldn't mind me helping you out What? Mel and James exchange confused looks Nick Short - 8:27 This is identical! Matt Eastland-Jones - 8:28 Yes, James confused yet determined And who might you be? Nick Short - 8:35 It's not the mayor again is it? It's the mayoress. Matt Eastland-Jones - 8:38 Why, I'm the one who kidnapped Michael of course. Nick Short - 8:42 What? Oh my god. Matt Eastland-Jones - 8:43 James gasped in surprise James angrily pointing at the figure, “and what gave you the right to kidnap my brother?” Nick Short - 8:52 He's the police chief.

Matt Eastland-Jones - 8:53 Mysterious figure Well, I had to do it to get back your father for abandoning me what James confused my father Who is your father? Mysterious figure “why, he’s the mayor of this town” *Laughing* Mel nodding. “Ah, now it all makes sense”. Nick Short - 9:20 Does it?! Matt Eastland-Jones - 9:23 So what do we do now? James. We turn him into the police of course. Exterior police station day. The kidnapper has been taken away into the station with Mel and James watching from the side. Mel triumphantly, well I guess that's that. James, yes, thanks to you, justice have been served. I can't thank you enough. Nick Short - 9:48 No it's not, they haven't found the brother. Matt Eastland-Jones - 9:50 Mel, don't worry, it was my pleasure. Fade out the end. Nick Short - 9:54 But they haven't found the brother. Matt Eastland-Jones - 9:56 It's the exact same story. I don't understand how it did that. I love it. Nick Short - 10:02 Oh my god. Matt Eastland-Jones - 10:04 Absolute nonsense. Nick Short - 10:05 A tale of two mayors. Matt Eastland-Jones - 10:06 Well, I then got it to write some titles for the story. Quite a lot of them are quite rubbish, but some of them are really good. So the rubbish ones are Murder, Mayhem and Comedy in Maybury Park, Tales of an Amateur Detective, Down to the Detail, Mel's Detective Story, but some of the good ones are Clues and Laughs Along the Way, Murder, Mystery and Mel. My favorite one is A Little Comedy with a Little Crime. (laughing). Oh, we’ve got Sleuthing for Fun and Justice. So yeah, but the most, the funniest thing, and that's what I was saying to you at the very, very start, before we started recording, my prompt for this was write a comedy murder mystery. I was wanting something like Knives Out, but it just made the detective a comedian. Nick Short - 11:00 Yeah. Matt Eastland-Jones - 11:01 But I did say, right, comedy murder mystery script full of cliches and movie tropes. Nick Short - 11:07 The mayor did it all along. Matt Eastland-Jones - 11:10 I mean it didn't really have any specific ones. It was just a bit ridiculous. No. But um, yeah. I actually think that might be one of my favourite stories to date. That was so funny. Nick Short - 11:21 Right. Fade in. Exterior. Street. At night. The street is silent save for the sounds of police sirens echoing in the distance. A few broken streetlights create pools of light on a deserted sidewalk, and somewhere, off screen, a cat screeches. Suddenly there is a commotion, commotion is spelt wrong, coming from one of the alleyways. Cut to interior alleyway, still night. It's dark and dingy, but scant patches of light reveal discarded garbage, strewn around piles of broken furniture and boxes full of god knows what lining both sides walls. Both sides walls? Both sides of the wall? Full of god knows what lining both sides walls. There are two figures struggling against one another near a dumpster at the end. It looks like they're fighting over something or someone. As an object falls out onto the ground, their faces become illuminated by a nearby lamppost. One belongs to MARY JOHNSON. It's in all caps. mid-30s while panting heavily next to her it's ALBERT SMITH also in caps early 40s police officers spill into the alleyway with guns drawn aiming them at Albert who slowly raises his hands in surrender seemingly accepting his fate as he stares into Mary's eyes with no emotion besides resignation officer barks freeze no one move what's going on here speak up now Albert. Matt Eastland-Jones - 12:55 Is it Officer Barks is Barks' last name?

Nick Short - 12:57 Barks is his last name. Matt Eastland-Jones - 13:00 Oh right. Nick Short - 13:01 As opposed to the Officer Barks. Matt Eastland-Jones - 13:03 The officer was barking. Nick Short - 13:05 Freeze! Nobody move! Albert. "I didn't do it officer, I swear!" They've literally just seen him beating up her. "I didn't do it officer, I swear!" Mary. "He's lying! This man is a murderer! He killed my husband and he was gonna kill me too!" Officer. "Alright, ma'am, calm down and tell us what happened from the beginning." Mary sobbing. "It all started when I came here looking for my husband, John. We had a big argument earlier and he'd run off somewhere in a rage that night. When I got here, I heard scuffling coming from further back in this alleyway, so naturally I was worried about what might be happening. So as soon as I walked over there, Albert emerged out of nowhere with something glinting silver in his hands. It looked like a knife! He noticed me watching and tried to run. That's why we were struggling. I saw him stab something, but then it quickly disappeared into the darkness. Officer Two. We've got Officer Barks and Officer Two. Sternly, where's your husband now? Have you seen him? Mary, look around. Is he still here? Matt Eastland-Jones - 14:09 Sassy. Nick Short - 14:10 All eyes follow Mary's gaze towards the dumpster nearby where she gasps. Wide-eyed at something just visible inside. The shape of what looks like human form collapsed on itself. Mary, voice breaking. "John, no, it can't be. Oh my God. Officer One, hushed, “Secure the scene and get back up here now. We may have a homicide on our hands”. End of scene." So I got to write the next scene. Introduce the detective and one clue. Fade in, exterior, alleyway, night. There is an eerie silence as the police investigate what could be a crime scene. Could be a crime scene? They have found a body? They found a man with a knife who said "I didn't do it" and a wife who went "he did do it". Officers are scouring the area and placing markers throughout. While emergency personnel examine the body which lies near one of the dumpsters, the man's eyes open in a lifeless stare towards nothing it seems. A few feet away stands Detective JERRY MAGUIRE, Matt Eastland-Jones - 15:14 Ooh, that’s good! Nick Short - 15:15 Still in all caps, late 30s, hands on hips and squinting thoughtfully into the night sky. He has a look about him that immediately commands respect from his fellow officers, who seem almost hesitant to disturb him, until he noticed something out of place at last and motions them to have a closer look. They all circle around an overturned box nearby, where emerald green threads form an intricate pattern along its edge. Clearly, remnants of clothing belonging to someone recently removed from this very location. Jerry kneels down examining it intently with a stern furrow brow before straightening back up again, glance cast towards each officer who all await his next move no doubt eager for answers. Jerry. "All right here's our first clue we need to find whoever those belong to right away someone called forensics ASAP "Let's figure out what we're dealing with here." "Beat." He adds voidly, "It looks like we're looking at murder." Fade in. Exterior. Alleyway. Night. The police officers have since moved the body to the morgue and are now busy assessing effective means of finding the culprit using gathered evidence. Tape recordings from witnesses. Ballistics testing from the weapon used in the attack. Open brackets. A small pocket knife still stained with traces of dried blood. Even bits and pieces of clothing that didn't belong here before were all part of it. Jerry Maguire is standing at the centre, going over the notes when suddenly a few more faces appear on scene, each belonging to one suspect after another. First suspect, a lady named Debbie Washington who admitted to being near the alleyway around the time due to an urgent appointment she had been waiting for, also claiming someone saw her talking to Mary Bronson earlier during her walk past this location. Mary Bronson, walking past the location with her arms deep in her pocket. Second suspect, an older man known as Joey Pence, who seems like he might have something important to contribute, but has thus far avoided any questioning. His alibi? He was home asleep. Third suspect, and then there's lastly Albert Smith, the same man witnessed by Mary Johnson a while ago. According to his statement, he'd been trying to desperately flee this alleyway out of fear once seeing what had happened. But no one was buying it. Not until they found a second piece of clue that seemed wholly unrelated yet somehow connected. Thrown amongst discarded furniture nearby was an old newspaper containing printouts about some shady investigation relating back to John Q’s death. Who is John Q’s? Oh sorry, John Q. Matt Eastland-Jones - 17:59 No, John, that's the guy who died. John's her husband. Nick Short - 18:03 It's John-Q. So is that his first name? Jonk. Matt Eastland-Jones - 18:05 Maybe.

Nick Short - 18:06 To Jonk's death, it must be significant. Jerry crouches down, eye sparkling, rarely tonight, fingering page apart, not sure how these two crimes are linked. Matt Eastland-Jones - 18:21 What? Nick Short - 18:22 What? But they found his body in the dumpster and then the two of them fighting? Is that the two crimes? I think they're linked because it's his wife and the woman who she thinks killed him. If only knew where start piercing all together. Matt Eastland-Jones - 18:36 Oh my god. Nick Short - 18:37 Sounds like we got our work cut out for us. Let's keep looking. Fade in, exterior, alleyway, night. The police are still trying to unravel the mystery behind Jonk's death when an officer notices a shoe on the ground in the corner near the dumpster. It appears to have been hidden under some debris and is visible only because one of the officers disturbed it while collecting evidence. Upon closer examination, it's found to be of a size too large for any of the victims, or suspects, and enough to make Jerry Maguire's attention peak. It’s just a clown shoe. He notices a few strands of string sticking out from inside. After gently yanking them out, he raises his eyebrows in surprise. It was a digital storage device designed to never break like conventional hard drives yet store large amounts data. Could this be something they had missed? Officer, “sir, we've found something here. What should we do with it”, Jerry, “We take it back with us and have it examined. Something tells me it's going to tell us more about Jonk's death than anything else so far”. Beat. “Alright everyone, let's pack up and get going. We don't have much time left”. Everyone quickly takes action, packing their final pieces evidence before finally fleeing from this eerie scene. Who knows what answers may lurk within the depths of that digital storage device? One thing clear, through intent finding them. Jerry Maguire isn't about to let murderer slip away from his grasp. Matt Eastland-Jones - 20:09 What is it? It's struggling.

Nick Short - 20:10 Right, got to conclude the story. Fade in, exterior, police station, day. The police station is bustling with activity. Officers coming and going while Jerry Maguire is inside his office, pouring over the evidence they collected during their investigation the night before. A map pinned onto the wall, covered in red pins showing the location of all three suspects, Debbie Washington, Joey Pence and Albert Smith, right before Mary Johnson found her husband, Jonk's body. Suddenly Jerry's eyes land on that digital storage device they found at the scene. It had been examined and all the contents within analysed, but finding anything conclusive among it seemed almost impossible. That was until he realised something. Amidst all the data stored inside was a video file which had been captured from a surveillance camera set up nearby the alleyway on that very night. The video showed clarity, everything that had happened that evening. From Debbie Washington's conversation with Mary Johnson, all way to unexpected appearance of Albert Smith with knife, threateningly raised high in his hands as he lunged towards something or someone off screen but then it stops abruptly for no reason at all almost like it had been cut short. Still in a shoe, they’re not questioning that it's a shoe. Jerry looks up from his desk, determination creeping his face and confidently strides outdoor towards Informant Cell where Albert Smith was still being held prisoner. It was time to get some answers. Exterior corridor outside cell. Day. Jerry stands outside Albert's prison cell with a fellow officer, arms crossed, as he stares indifferently at the man seated inside fiddling nervously with his cuffs. After a few moments of awkward silence, he finally speaks. "Jerry. So you killed Jonk, didn't you?” Albert, takes a beat. "Yes." "It was an accident though! I just wanted him to stay away from Debbie. He didn't have to die. "I'm sorry." Jerry nods slowly, eyes never leaving Albert's face. He knew he had solved the case. I don't know how, but he knew he'd done it. Perhaps it was the fact that he had a knife. Matt Eastland-Jones - 22:20 And the confession. Nick Short - 22:22 Yeah. The only thing left now was justice being served upon those responsible for Jonk's death. And no matter how much he wanted to let it slide this time, in the end duty comes first, and nothing else would ever be more important than upholding the law. Jerry, that's it then. We got our murderer. Thank you officer, as he pats him on the shoulder. Let's not waste any more time tilting windmills. Matt Eastland-Jones - 22:48 What? Nick Short - 22:49 Let's not waste any more time tilting windmills. Let's finally put this case to bed. The detective takes one last look into the cell before turning away without another word. We fade out as he strides away down the corridor, certainty of their success still lingering heavily in the air. The end. Matt Eastland-Jones - 23:05 Wow. Who'd have thought the first suspect was the… Nick Short - 23:09 The guy with the knife, the only one who was actually at the crime scene. Matt Eastland-Jones - 23:12 The one who was seen assaulting someone. Nick Short - 23:15 Yes, who he wanted to protect, he was assaulting her to protect her, it makes perfect sense. Right, I've got to write some titles. The Alleyway Mystery, Clues of the Night, Dead End Street, I quite like Dead End Street. Matt Eastland-Jones - 23:27 That's all right, yeah. Nick Short - 23:30 Death and the Detectives: A trail of blood and tears. Murder in the shadows. No justice, no peace. I like Dead End Street. Yeah, that's a good one. Matt Eastland-Jones - 23:41 So there you have it, two murder mystery stories. Next week, we're going to be covering pranky prompts for April Fools and just to let you know, we've also released a website where you can listen to all of the episodes, as well as send in your own prompts for stories. So if you've got an idea for an AI story that you want us to cover in a later episode, then head over to AwaitingPrompt.com and submit your prompt. Nick Short - 24:05 That's everything for this episode of Awaiting Prompt. Matt Eastland-Jones - 24:08 If you enjoyed it, then please leave us a review and make sure to subscribe so you can stay up to date with all future episodes.